Growing Pains

Natalie has been suffering from occasional growing pains. She complains that her legs hurt and asks me to stretch or squeeze them. More often than not, she is running, jumping around and climbing all over the house--she may just be seeking extra attention—so I’m not at all concerned about her condition. Besides, I’ve had my own discomforts to deal with. Mine are the parental growing pains that a mother feels as she watches her children pass through various stages of life. I keep thinking, “I’m not ready for this.”

A few weeks ago, Caleb had the maturation discussion at school. He brought home a booklet that tactfully explained the changes a boy’s body will go through. He wasn’t at all embarrassed or uncomfortable with talking about what he learned. He was given a sample of Old Spice Red Zone deodorant and told to take care of his body by using it after a daily shower. True to his nature, he’s taken it all very much to heart. He was already in the habit of showering daily, but using that little stick has become serious business. He didn’t even want to store it in the bathroom; he felt more comfortable with it on his night stand so that he would "always know right where it was.” He insists on carrying it personally to the bathroom every morning.

I admit that he sometimes has that sweaty kid smell. He is very active and plays hard so when he comes in from the yard on a warm day, he does emit that musty, doesn’t-smell-good-but-still-not-totally-offensive odor. It’s completely different than actual body odor if you ask me. But I could see the value of establishing good hygiene habits now so since he was showing extreme enthusiasm for his deodorant, I was supportive of its application. I felt all uneasy as I watched him use it for the first time. He held it at the end of one long and gangly arm while the other was bent awkwardly above his head. “Is this right, Mom?” he asked as he began to lather it on the front edge of his bony shoulder. I faked feeling comfortable with the situation as I adjusted his waggling hand to his arm pit.

How did my baby boy get to be a deodorant-wearing preteen? This is just not sitting well with me. A boy who still has size 3/4 boxers in his underwear drawer should not be smelling like an old man. But every time he reaches up to give me a hug—the scent holds strong the whole day through—I get a whiff of that grown-up cologne-like smell. Sure, it’s probably more pleasant than sweaty-kid smell but it’s also an everyday reminder that my boy’s growing up all too fast. There are still so many ways in which he seems younger than others his age which probably only adds to my denial of having arrived at this stage.

Alyssa has also entered a new stage of development that is causing me parental growing pains. She’s been anticipating this event for months, maybe even years. She wiggled her first front tooth out Monday night and the second came out last night. She was unbelievably excited and I tried to share her joy but I really wanted to cry. She couldn’t wait for the tooth fairy to come and even left her a note that read, “Why do you take the teeth?”

Good question.

She does look really cute right now with that gaping hole in her mouth but, I’m all too aware of what fills that space. She’s always been teeny tiny in every way. Everything about her is small, including her mouth. The dentist warned me at her last visit that he could see some big (too big for her mouth) permanent teeth waiting to take root in her gums. Oh the teeth that are about to take over the face of my beautiful little girl! She even said to her dad, “When my big teeth come in, I’m going to look like a bunny.”

Sad but true.

I know I wouldn’t want them to be little forever so we’ll just have to live through these growing pains.