Friday, March 23, 2012

My Own March Madness

March Madness is in full swing and Caleb is living every minute of it.  (And yes, I meant living even though loving would also be appropriate here.)  He carefully watches his bracket and keeps it up-to-date.  He's currently in 3rd place in our family tournament.  Jon says he votes too much with his heart.  I agree.

He's been playing a lot more backyard hoops, too.  Sometimes Hunter joins him, but mostly he reenacts games all on his own, complete with full commentation.  I hear the play-by-play even with the windows and doors shut.  It's his happy place.

I am envious of him.  I wish I could so easily escape to my own world where nothing else matters and I always win.  I have been in turmoil; my own personal March Madness.

Last Thursday, suddenly and almost inexplicably, my job was taken from me.  Poor communication, lies and accusations for others' actions have left me to cry bitter tears.  Lots of them.  Why I am made to carry the load of blame is an injustice I will never understand.

I've spent three years building a highly competitive program.  I have 6 state champions under my belt.  How is it that my talents are not valued?  Even the uproar of outraged parents, those whom I have diligently served, could do nothing to reverse the situation--though their respect and support has helped soothe my wounds.  Still, it feels that my own good name, hard work and dedication have been marred.  So unfair!

Having to hold our sobbing daughters has perhaps been the hardest part.  How do we help them understand a situation that we as grown adults can't comprehend?  I've used up countless cell phone minutes as I've fielded texts and phone calls from those who know and love me best and pledge their undying support.  Still, it hurts.

I listen to Caleb in his backyard world, living out his March Madness while I sit at the table highlighting a conference talk on forgiveness.

I want a happy place.  And some chocolate, too.  That would be nice.


Erin said...

There's lot of chocolate in NY...and 70 degree weather too!

Hope things start getting a little better soon.

Jen said...

What?!! O.K. I need some details. Expect a phone call this weekend. Sending happy vibes to you! If you need a get away we are not too far and would always love to have you and your family around!

Lucy said...

Love you, Tara. That gym just lost a powerful coach and good person. Their loss but I know it hurts. You are awesome and I hope you find solace soon.

Michelle said...


Holly said...

That's crazy! I agree - it's their loss. Sorry you have to go through this though.

Ben and Carrie said...

So sorry to hear about this. You are a wonderful coach and so many girls have benefited from your talent and expertise. What a rotten situation.

Emily said...

I thought I had left a comment in Helena...totally agree it's their loss. Hope you can find some peace soon ((((hugs))))

Amy Jones said...

I'm so sorry! I'm here hoping you find peace (and chocolate) soon.